Since I was young, I have wondered about why people do what they do, the intricacies of relational dynamics, and one’s internal world. As I matured in my relationship with the Lord, I learned that I love to encourage others, and wanted to learn to do that more skillfully. I also felt a growing passion for helping family relationships thrive.

It is such a great privilege to partner with God in bringing restoration and healing to confusing, unknown, difficult, or painful places in one’s life. I love that I get to help people move toward healing and freedom. I get to watch their steps of courage, be encouraged by their perseverance, and witness God at work up close.

I feel that I’ve grown in this over a long period of learning myself better, understanding the impact of different seasons of life, and also through failing to do it well during seasons of intense stress. What I’ve learned is that I need to intentionally create space to process, mentally sort and make sense of things, and journal prayers to God, allowing emotions to well up and be tended to.

I really enjoy walking with women of all seasons through their stories to help them understand themselves, their emotions and thought patterns, and their relationships better. I have a good bit of experience counseling through the effects of past trauma, grief and loss, parenting, and anxiety.

I really appreciate the path Aundi Kolber leads readers through in Try Softer, which is full of practical tools. David Powlison’s God’s Grace in Your Suffering provides space to honestly engage with the difficult areas in your journey with his humble shepherding tone. Dark Clouds Deep Mercy by Mark Vroegop teaches the needed skill of lament in order to bear the weight of trauma, grief, and suffering. Shame: Being Known and Loved is a good one I recommend as an additional resource to complement the battle against shame.

While I do carve out time to dig into scripture, my times of journaling and prayer throughout the day help me build a bridge from what I believe is true about God, myself, and others into the details of my day. Journaling lets me slow down and weave the gospel into my thoughts and feelings. Turning to God all throughout my day helps me reframe my experiences so that I learn to live what I believe rather than form my beliefs based on what I experience in life.

I love being with people and outside in nature. A combination of those two is even better – hiking, walking, group games. I enjoy a good movie with my family, exploring new places, travel, and engaging with our church community.

Some significant experiences in my life that have led me to learn, grow, seek out understanding, and create deeper dependence on the Lord include my parents’ divorce at a young age, parenting my own two, caring for a parent with Alzheimer’s, and grieving 3 significant losses in 4 years. I was shaped greatly through learning to admit my limitations, that failure doesn’t define, that we are made for relationships but that they are messy, and to “pay attention to what I’m paying attention to” (Curt Thompson).

Pray! Breathe slower and deeper. Share with a trusted person. Ask for help. Stay present.